My world

My world

Saturday, December 31, 2011

New Years Resolution 2012

After a long time searching my heart and soul, I realized there are two really good resolutions that I am going to work on in the year 2012................
Number one is FORGIVENESS.............
I am going to learn myself how to forgive people of what they did or what they will do to me in the upcoming year.  I am going to teach myself to just let things roll off my shoulders. 
Number two is TRUST...............
I will learn to trust my family and hope that everything that comes out of there mouths is not a lie but the truth.  I will learn my self not to lie or bend the truth!
These two resolutions might be easier said then done, I have had lots of issues with my family in the past, I really really have to be patient with my family and of course, I also have to be patient with myself.....

Friday, December 30, 2011

Blowing the top off....

I have been wondering when any of my sisters were going to come and see there niece.  So this morning I emailed or should I say I asked them on there face book page.  Let's just say..... they were FIRED UP!!  I was just trying to let them know how I was feeling about them not coming to see my little girl, but, I guess the table turned and they let me have it.  I guess it is not worth pushing the issue!
Sometimes I feel as if I was born into the wrong family.  I guess when your family has never been close it is too late to try when you are 34 years old.  Oh well, I tried. It is all up in there hands!
We will see if 2012 changes.  Who knows what will happen.  If not I guess I still have the most perfect family, that I could ever ask for.  We will see what happens!

Wednesday, December 28, 2011

BFF

When I was young I always thought it would be cool to have a BFF (best friend forever).  I could never find a person that didn't already have a BFF.  I didn't want to be a BFF to someone who already had a BFF.  I know selfish right... Wrong I didn't want to share my BFF with anyone.  I never wanted to feel like the third wheel, but in the end I was.  Needless to say, I never had a BFF until 12 years ago when I met my husband.  
When he first asked me out I said, "No, I was busy this weekend"  then he would asked about the following weekend and the following weekend. Let's just say he asked me out 6 - 9 times before I agreed to going somewhere with him.   I did not know if I really wanted to date him.  He had long hair that he flipped under his hat.  Lets just say I was not attracted to him.  But, he was very persistent and I agreed to go somewhere with him.  Unsure of where we went on our first date.  It could have been bowling with friends, pool with friends, or maybe I think we went to the races but telling you the truth, I do not remember what we did on our first date.  I know terrible right.  I think it was because I didn't think of it as a first date.   I remember it was good whatever we did do.  Lets just say, we have been together ever since.  He is my best friend, he is my true love, he is the father of my child, and he is wonderful.  My husband is compassionate, caring, loving, beautiful inside and out, he is one heck of a catch if you know what I mean.  He is mine for life and I could not have a happier life.  He makes it wonderful to wake up next to. Without him I would be lost.  He is the best thing that has ever happened to me.  When I am sad, he builds me up. He knows exactly what to say to me on my down days.  He is my one true love.  My life is complete.  He completes me, and Gabriella completes me too. I have a perfect family.  And, finally after all these years I have my own BFF and I am truly happy.....

Tuesday, December 27, 2011

2011

It has been a great 2011!  The beginning of 2011 was wonderful, we found out we were pregnant with our little girl; Gabriella Raye.  That was the happiest day of our lives.  Well, besides the day she came into the world on October 20, 2011.  We finished building and have moved into our new log home that we have been working on for nearly 6 years.    I guess you could say we are still moving into our home for 6 months now.  We are slowly buying furniture for the new home.  We are buying all the furniture slowly so then we don't have to finance furniture.  Lets just say delayed gratification.  In July we finally moved in.  We couldn't be happier.  
Then October came and we gave birth to the most beautiful baby in the world... Maybe I am biased but its my child I can be :)  She was on a biliblanket and lights for a week.  Or should I say a LONG week.  She is still dealing with bilirubin issues but it is because of my breast milk.  It is called breast milk jaundice.  Minor issue, it should clear up and resolve in a matter of time.  
But any who, we gave birth to Gabriella Raye Richter at 832 pm on October 20th, 2011 after being in labor for nearly 16 hours and pushing for 1.5 hours our little bundle of joy came into this world.  What a happy day!  She is perfect, she is beautiful, and she is our's.  
Then in December, while being on Maternity leave, I have decided to go part~time.  I can not justify letting my baby girl go to day care for 150-200 dollars a week.  Yes, I said a week.  I personally am not fond of  childcare places anyways.  I just envision terrible things and I think for my own sake it will be better if I raise my own child.  I think if I raise my own child too, there will be less sickness I have to deal with in my family.  I know, they are out there for a reason, but if I can make it possible for me to raise my own child I am going to try with all my might.  We will see... how it goes, living one day at a time.

We are so excited to start the next chapter of our life.  We couldn't have asked for a better year.  So hats off to 2011. What a wonderful year it was.  and........
BRING ON 2012

Monday, December 26, 2011

Right Breast!

Looks like the lump is staying the same, Ultrasound was today.. The doctor is calling mammography specialist  to see if a breast feeding mother can have a mammogram.  I guess if they can't do a mammogram I will stop breast feeding, I do not want to procrastinate on such a touchy topic.  
Ultrasound today was inclusive.  Unsure of what they were looking at, they want me to get a mammogram.  Hope its just extra fatty tissue.  Better than the big C.  

Sunday, December 25, 2011

Christmas

I am very blessed to have Dale and Gabriella in my life.  Thank you for all the wonderful blessings! Merry Christmas!

Friday, December 23, 2011

Part~timer

I am excited to announce that when I go back to work after maternity leave I will be PART TIME.  I could not be anymore excited :)  I guess we just turned the page to the next chapter in our lives and life is getting better!  Bring on the New Year!

Thursday, December 22, 2011

Full time, Part time or Casual Work Status

I am trying to figure out if I should change my status at work from Full~time to Part~time for Gabriella's sake.  I personally have a lot of mixed feeling about sending my child to day care.  I am not completely fond of day cares.  I think I am more scared than anything, plus I do not want my kid to come home all the time with a cold or a sickness.  I guess I want to protect her as much as I can.  I know I can't protect her, her whole life, but I want to at least try to limit sickness that she has.  I guess sending my child to child care has me envisioning that she will be in a play pen all day by herself and no one will pay her any attention.  That would completely break my heart.  I know we are OVERLY PROTECTIVE, I just tried so hard to get her here, and I personally want to keep her here.  Eventually I want to go casual status at work where I can pick and choose my hours and no on call. We are looking into individual health plans.  The insurance is really good and it would less than I will be paying being part time at my job through my group plan.  The only catch is that it does not cover maternity.  Will I have another baby, I am not sure.  I husband says, "NO", he is completely satisfied with Gabriella.....The only question is....am I.  A few years back I would have said one is plenty, now I think  Gabriella may need a playmate.   Who knows what direction our life will go. I guess for now,  I am just happy being a family of three.  We are blessed, we are happy and we are content.   

Wednesday, December 21, 2011

Drying up the Girls

I have been breast feeding for 3 months now, or should I say I have been pumping and putting the milk into bottles.  It is just more convenient for our life style. It is nice when daddy can help feed at night.  However, I do have an amazing sleeper.  I guess the concern starts because in two weeks I have to go back to work I have to either pump at work which would be very difficult or I need to start drying the girls up.  I would love to keep pumping for Gabriella longer, but with working it is very difficult.  I am not sure what to do here.  I can pump at work but I am a very self conscious  person, they don't have a good place for you to pump, and half the time I do not get a break so it would be after work hours anyways.  I do however have up to 2 months of breast milk stored in the freezer.  
How do you dry up the girls? Is it painful? I am starting to only pump 3 times a day instead of 5 times a day.  I have been getting 30 ounces of breast milk per day with pumping 5 x a day.  I also use a vitamin called FENUGREEK.  I ran out yesterday so I am deciding if I should or if I should not buy some more.  I guess Dale, my husband tells me to stop breast pumping and let it all go, but in the back of my head I keep saying it is better for her than formula.  If you use formula which one do/did  you use and did your baby like it?  I am not sure what to do, I only have 2 weeks before I go back to work.  I should have thought about this a little sooner.  
I guess the big question here is how did you dry up your girls without all the discomfort and not getting mastitis. Can you help a milking mom in need... Any suggestions????

Monday, December 19, 2011

Gabby's First Santa Experience


After long consideration, Dale and I decided to take Gabriella to see Santa on 12-14-11 in the Wausua Mall.  We had a lot of fun together as a family.  We however, didn't do much in the mall but see Santa, but it was a great family day spent together.  I love when my hubby takes off work early so we can do special things together as a family.  I am totally in love with our little family.  This little girl is my whole world and then some, I just couldn't imagine life without her.  Love you Gabriella Raye Richter my little Santa's Reindeer!!!

Monday, December 12, 2011

Lump Part Two

So today,  I got an unexpected phone call from the surgeons office.  Unexpected because I never told the fertility doctor which surgeon I wanted to mess with my lump in my right breast.  I guess, I will get who she picks.  I will have to request the surgeon that I want, because two of the surgeons that I work with I really don't like there motives.  That is a nice way to put it.  But, anyways, they called to tell me they wanted me to do an Ultrasound of the area to see what is really going on.   They said that if the ultrasound comes back normal then they will not do anything about the lump.  If the ultrasound shows something then they will have me come in and get a mammogram or should I say the boobie squishier.  They said they have to call the lactation consultant to see if I can have the ultrasound as soon as possible or see if I have to stop breast feeding my child.  Either way, I am going to get this lump checked out because I do not want to wait to long just in case it turns out to be the BIG C.     Personally I think I have always had lumpy breasts.  So I will just have to wait and see...

Saturday, December 10, 2011

To See Santa or Not to See Santa....

I am not sure if I want to take my daughter who is 8 weeks old to see Santa or Not see Santa.  I keep thinking in the back of my head that the pictures would be PRICELESS... But, then on the other hand I do not want to take her to a germ infested environment, just to please myself.  But then I think I would be really upset if I skipped it all together and miss out on the opportunity for the pictures with Santa.  She might enjoy seeing them later in life.  Did you get yours done for your little one at such a young age or should I let this year pass.. HELP.  Unsure of what to do.  I need to believe in the magic of Christmas, and just go with my instincts and just get them done.  So with that said I will find a place to take her close to home :)

Friday, December 9, 2011

A Lump....

I do not know what to think right now.... 
     A few weeks back I found a slender, round, hard nodule in my right breast, I wasn't to concerned with it because I just thought it was from breast feeding and I figured one of my milk ducts was just a little bit bigger than the rest.  
     Well, today I went to the fertility clinic and the doctor there wants me to go see a surgeon.  She wants to get the nodule biopsied.  My doctor does not think it is too concerning because she thinks it just a cyst, but the nodule is getting bigger.  The first thing she asked was, "Is there any history of breast cancer in your family."  I said, "NO."  As a precautionary measure she wants me to go see a surgeon. I am freaking right now.  So many emotions.  I guess the biggest thing is I am not sure which surgeon I want to see for I work with all of them at the hospital, and to me it is a little embarrassing.  I know, I know they deal with this crazy stuff all the time but  I work with them, that is the difference.  I guess this is just a little bit out of my comfort area.  I can see having joint surgery or appendix, but a breast..   Give me a break or should I say a breast..  I guess I have many things running through my head right now.  I am mostly concerned that it might be the big C.  
How can this be happening I was just blessed with a beautiful baby girl who I love and cherish and want to spend every waking moment with her.  But now......I am not sure what is going to happen.  I truly believe in my heart that it is a CYST and not CANCER.  But, I am going to get it checked and see where it goes from there.  I will keep you posted... If she thought it was cancer I think she would had made me get in to see the surgeon as soon as possible.. But, she does not seem to be too concerned with it, so with that said... I will live my life, and live it to the fullest..  after I get my lumpy breast checked.  

Thursday, December 8, 2011

Family Biz

I would say I do not have a typical family, but rather an uncaring one.  So I had a baby 7 weeks ago, and the only one on my side of the family that came to see my baby was my mother and my niece Brittany.  I have 3 sisters and 2 brothers, and none of them went out of there way to welcome my little peanut into this world.  So yes, I am very bitter about it.  I am very hurt..  
I feel like I was born into the wrong family.  I just wished they would care that Gabriella is part of the family.  I am not sure if I am hurt or just pissed because I always go out of my way for all of them and this is how they repay me.  
So, I came to the conclusion, that I am cutting myself out of my family for good.. If they don't care about me or my baby or my husband why should I care about them?  I do not need negativity in my life, I don't need them in my life and I defiantly don't care what they think about me anymore.  I am sick of them dragging me down, and I really don't feel like they care about my Gabriella.  I am a parent now, and I need to protect my child from all the negativity in her life.  I feel that my family is very negative and she does not have to go through that.  
Is it bad when the people you work with care about your child more than your own family?  Is it terrible that I feel this way?  Should I keep giving them chances?  What do you think I should do?
I am done....I am hurt......and I am a little bitter........

Thursday, November 10, 2011

Flat nipples and nipple shields

Okay, so about my last post... Breasts VS. Formula.... I think my biggest issue here is that I have Flat nipples and I have to wear a nipple shield every time I feed my little sweet pea.  Let me tell you WHAT A PAIN in the neck it is to remember to wear in the middle of the night.  I really don't mind, but sometimes I misplace them and then I have to go all over the house looking for it.  Yes, I have more than one.They are also pretty expensive for a little piece of rubber.  They cost 8 dollars and that's all it is a little piece rubber that resembles a nipple (like a bottle) and it fits perfectly around your brown part of your nipple. It helps the baby latch on to you better.  I guess that I will continue to use it because it is what works for Gabby and me.  Does anyone else have this problem?  It works so I will keep using them!!!  

 Oh and by the way last Friday I had an appointment to see the Doctor and Gabriella weighed 6 pounds and 2 ounces, yesterday  I took her in and she now weighs 6 pounds, 15 ounces.  She is almost 7 pounds.  The doctor told me to keep up my good work with the breast feeding.  I was like, I didn't think I was doing that great.  But, I guess she is getting what she needs, so I will keep breast feeding and using the nipple shield because that is what works for us! 





Tuesday, November 8, 2011

Breast vs. Formula

Have you ever breast feed your baby?  It is hard work.  I am 3 weeks into breastfeeding and I think I  am lacking milk supply. I just don't think I can keep up with the demands of my baby.   My baby is always on the boob, but sometimes I feel she is using me as a nookie.  I called the lactation consultant and she told me I am fine, but I feel she is not getting what she needs.  I sometimes give her a supplement of formula just to help boost her a little so my boob can have an hour rest.  How many ounces of milk should I be producing in the 3rd week?  I understand your body knows what to make according to the demand of the baby, but like I said I need to increase something because she is always on my boob.  I also thought of switching to formula, just for the convenience factor.  I know, I know breast is best.  I know all about the immunity factors and everything that pertains, but sometimes life is just easier when it is more convenient.  I guess I just want some advise from other mothers who have breast feed.  Is it normal to feel this way?  One of my friends told me that she was pumping 8-9 ounces by the third week.  I am lucky if I get 2.5 ounces from both breasts.  Is this so called normal?  I am not sure what to do about the whole breast feeding ordeal.  I am a little frustrated! I feel like a dried up old cow! Any advise for a gal in need?  

Thursday, November 3, 2011

October 20, 2011... The happiest day of my life....

It was like any other day, I woke up at 2 am to do my normal bathroom routine, but today was different.  My water broke after I went to the bathroom.  I woke up my husband that was sleeping in the bed right next to the bathroom.  I said, "Dale, Dale, my water broke; and I AM ON CALL for work."  I don't know which was more scary being on call for work or having your water break without having any contractions.  Dale called OB/GYN for me because it was 1 hour in and I was not contracting at all.  They told us to wait it out for 1 more hour and then come in.  So that is just what we did.. We waited, and waited and waited but no contractions.  Dale called them back and said we are not contracting yet.  We were told to come in right away.  When we got to the hospital I got wheel chaired up to my room 301.  I am not sure that I needed a wheel chair ride, but it was included in the room.  So we got up to the room and the doctor came in after the nurse had her paper work all straightened out and put in the computer.  The nurse checked my dilation. I was 2 cm dilated at this point.  Too soon to push.  She said because I was not contraction they were going to start me on Pitocin. Did you ever have pitocin?  They called it the killer medication of induction of labor, and let me tell you it was bad.  I contracted ever 1-2 minutes and never dilated.  The pain was so bad, that my blood pressure went up to 210/115 at one point.  I am still dealing with the blood pressure issues now 2 weeks after delivery.
Dr. Jamison was one of the OB doctors on call that day, she came in and said, her blood pressure is too high we need to start an epidural.  The anesthesiologist come in and started the epidural, and eventually it turned into a spinal, I couldn't feel anything.  I couldn't move anything from the waist down.  It was scary.  I think an epidural you are supposed to have some sensation.  I had absolutely no feeling from my rib cage down.  It was a little bit scary.  In the mean time however, I didn't feel anything so they turned off the epidural completely and when it wore off I had the worst pain imaginable.  It was quite the experience.
When I was 7-8 cm dilated the doctor (Dr. Petkouv) asked me what I wanted to do.  I remember saying, "Let's get this over  with."  so at 7 cm dilated I pushed and pushed and pushed.  I believe I pushed for 2 hours.    But the baby still wouldn't come out.  The doctor had to do suction on my little ones head to get her out.  her head was turned the wrong way making it very difficult for her to come out.  With one leg completely numb and not able to feel and the other leg I could feel everything, made it quite hard to deliver a baby.  I pushed when I thought there should be a contraction, unsure if I felt one or not by this point.  need less to say I pushed and I delivered a 5 pound 10 ounce baby.  I did however get 2 stitches because I pushed before I was totally dilated.  But I am one happy mama.. So the details of the event is that I was in labor for 16 hours, and pushed for about 2 hours. But I couldn't be more happy to be holding my baby Gabriella Raye Richter.  She makes my world complete.  She is my whole world.  I love you Gabby :)










Wednesday, November 2, 2011

Our News Paper announcement :)

 Ministry Saint Michael's Hospital Oct. 20, 2011 RICHTER, Jennifer and Dale, Custer, a daughter, Gabriella Raye.

Monday, October 17, 2011

All packed and ready to go!

We are ready, we are ready..... You can make your grand entrance at anytime.  My bags are pack and ready to go.  I am getting very anxious to meet my little girl.  I am not really that uncomfortable.  I am just starting to feel a lot of pressure in my pelvic area.  I think she is getting closer to her grand entrance.  But Dale and I are really really ready and excited for her to come, so come anytime.  We are waiting patiently :)

Thursday, October 13, 2011

Its the final count down

In 14 days or so, I should be a mommy.  Will I be good or will I be bad will be completely and totally up to me. I will try to be the best mommy Gabriella could ask for.  I will strive to help her through all angles of her life.  At first it will definitely be trail and error.  But is anyone really PERFECT at being a mommy.  I guess I just have to believe in my self and go from there.
Here is an updated picture at 36 1/2 weeks.  I can not wait to hold my little bundle of fun.  I am so excited to become a mommy it is unbelievable.  Wish me luck as the weeks are coming down to an end and I deliver my little pride and joy.  I could not be more excited!

Tuesday, August 16, 2011

Gestational Diabetes

I guess after my 12 hour fasting glucose monitoring I have gestational diabetes.  I went 12 hours with out eating or drinking anything and then I had to drink some really crappy sugary substance, that made me want to vomit.  Then for the next 3 hours they drew my blood to see what each sugar was.  I was  a little high so they are sending me to a dietitian.  I am not thrilled about going to see one, but I will for my baby.  I only drink water and I don't really consume much sugar in my diet.  We will see what the dietitian says.  I guess I have the appointment in the middle of September.  Okay so they want me to be on a diabetic diet for like one month of my pregnancy.  I guess I will go meet with her once and then I will manage it at home.  Who would have known...

Wednesday, August 10, 2011

Baby's Name Part 2

If you are reading this........
you will now know the name of my little girl that is growing in my belly.....
Dale and I; have decided to name our precious little girl...........
Gabriella Raye Richter

Wednesday, August 3, 2011

Baby's Name

I am getting irritated with my mother and her boyfriend, and my mother in law.. I picked out my own name.  I am not naming my child after either one of you so GIVE IT UP... I happen to really enjoy the name that I have picked for my little girl.  My mother and her boyfriend thinks I should name it Ann Elizabeth after her... I don't think so...  And why would I for my brother named his kid after you so why do we want another ANN in the family.  Sorry not happening.  And my mother in law...Who wants to name there kid Viola... You had your chance to name your children, maybe you should have named one of them Viola JR or Princess Viola.  My child will not be named after either one of you, so GIVE IT UP already....
My child will not be named Elizabeth Viola, or Viola Ann.. Sorry not happening.  My child will have there own special name with a wonderful meaning.  This is one reason why I am not sharing my name of my baby with my family.  Sorry.....

Baby's room progress

So from my last post on June 29th I was going to do some cool things with the baby's room.  Lets just say FROG TAPE does not work.  I would not recommend it if you have a little bit of  texture on your walls.  I spent 2 hours taping and painting a brown line through out the room.  I thought in the back of my head while I was doing this that is was going to AWESOME.  But then I ripped off the green FROG TAPE, and it was a disaster.  There was runs all over.  Really ticked this pregnant lady off...  No more FROG TAPE for me.  Don't spend your money on it; it is CRAP.
Then my wonderful husband that I have went and bought me a border for our baby's room and then it turned out wonderful...
What do you think????   We are going with a jungle theme... Kids love animals right :)



End of construction on the house











Dale and I are excited to be done with this chapter in our life... Now it is time to go shopping for furniture to fill up the house :)

Wednesday, June 29, 2011

Baby's Room

I am going to tempt to repaint the baby's room.  She is going to enjoy the lovely green and jungle theme.  but I am going to add a strip of brown and put pok~a~dots on the top portion of the wall.  I am not an artist nor do I pretend I am.  I just want something a little different for my little one.  It will be okay I think.  I will start this afternoon and post some updates on the little ones room.  maybe I will even start setting up her crib.  This is a very exciting time for Dale and I.  I just wished the artistic fairy would magically twirl her wand and it would be completely the way I want it.  We will see the end results.  Wish me luck, for I am not sure how the dots are going to turn out.  Any Suggestions??

Have a great Summer day everyone :)

Monday, June 27, 2011

We are blessed

I am finally starting to feel my little peanut start to move.  I am so very excited.  A couple weeks ago Dale and I found out that the little pride and joy that is growing in my belly is a ...... GIRL.... We couldn't be more thrilled.  Now, I am in the transition that I want to be a stay at home mom.  But, I don't want my nursing skills to go completely out the window, so I think come March of next year I may want to just become minimal part~time.  We need to figure out the the insurance BS but Dang that's all I want to do is stay home with my little girl.  I am so excited to be carrying this wonderful gift that god has given Dale and I.  We are blessed!!!  At our appointment we also found out that she does not have any heart defects like I did when I was a baby, so we were thankful..  We were given the perfect gift!  I am so excited and can not wait to meet our bundle of joy.  I couldn't be happier.



Saturday, June 18, 2011

Exciting News!

Dale and I had an ultrasound on Thursday to see if the baby has any birth defects with the heart, we are both excited to say, the baby did not take on its moms genes in that department.  the baby's heart is healthy.  We also found out that we are having a girl :)  We couldn't be more excited!!

Thursday, June 16, 2011

Aunt Gloria very talented lady!




My Aunt Gloria was very talented with the needle.  She was laid to rest May 3rd 2011, before she passed she made the efforts in making me a couple of items.  A Doll and a baby blanket.  Just look at the detail... She sure was talented!

First gift to baby from Daddy!


Dale bought the baby a wind up lion for his/her room.  So exciting!